What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
i believe in u and ur pee
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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