i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
