can we get nightvision for the apartment?
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
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