SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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