I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Randomize