? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
