I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
