And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
