I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
