wanna go halves on a baby?
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Randomize
