Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize