drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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