i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
