a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize