Pregnant stripper...not hot.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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