Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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