try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Randomize
