I skipped work to stalk him.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
