i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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