I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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