Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
