hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
