i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Holy shit dude........stairs
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize