you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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