very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
