Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
found the other keg... it's in the tree
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
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