i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
