found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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