Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
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