drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I will be naked everywhere
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
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