Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
