holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
