No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
