Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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