I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
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