what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
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