I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Randomize
