I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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