You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
My penis needs a shock collar
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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