Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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