In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Randomize
