Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize