I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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