My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
