Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
