Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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