Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Randomize
