ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
