Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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