Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Randomize
